This is part four of a six-part series on relationships and family life for night shift workers. In this session, licensed marriage and family therapist Haley Nagi discusses how night shift workers can navigate their social lives while managing unconventional schedules.
Key topics covered include:
- Maintaining friendships – Finding ways to stay connected despite opposite schedules.
- Social event management – Strategies for planning and attending events while balancing work.
- Community involvement – Alternative ways to engage with and support your community.
- Building support networks – Identifying trusted friends, family, and professional resources.
This session provides practical tools for fostering relationships and staying socially engaged while working nontraditional hours.
0:01 - 0:08
hello and welcome back to your guide to relationships and family life as a night shift worker this is part four social life navigation
0:08 - 0:36
if you remember my name is Haley Nagi I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist I've experienced working with couples families and individuals ages 4 to 65 I specialize in family systems and relational issues and I like to focus on understanding family systems relationship relational Dynamics and how to make changes within those systems
0:36 - 0:47
the agenda for this part is maintaining friendships social event management Community involvement and building support networks
0:47 - 1:31
maintaining friendships um so the first thing in maintaining a friendship is trying to find ways to stay connected um find ways to connect throughout the day or throughout the week this could look like texting sending TikTok Snapchatting scheduling phone calls facetimes um I think of any traditional friendship you most likely aren't in constant communication everyone has jobs maybe children families other activities and hobbies that they're doing so keep it simple find ways that feel like connection for you and your friend or friends um and stick with that
1:31 - 2:14
another thing you can do is make plans making weekly bi-weekly monthly you know whatever time frame Works make those plans and stick to them if it's easiest for us all to connect um on a day that I'm off from work or you know early evening before I go to work you know finding a day and time that works and trying to keep those plans um this could also be a routine when you get together you know maybe we go to the gym every morning as soon as I get off or maybe we have a scheduled book club every month but again finding that day and time that work for you and your friend or you and the whole group of friends will really make a difference
2:14 - 2:48
and then communication share what is hard or easy about this process with your friends you know letting them know where you're at in the process being open with communication um nobody can know what something is like for you you unless you tell them if you remember from other parts we were talking about how people are not mind readers and so even though something may seem obvious to you it is probably not obvious to them so sharing what this is like for you and if it's been hard or easy or what you need
2:48 - 3:38
social event management um so these are just suggestions they are not have toos but one of the things you might do is compromise on planning um if you are the person who is hosting you might need to find a time that works for both you and the other person or people that are coming and this isn't again a have to I'm not saying you have to compromise on your boundaries but it might mean that sometimes if I want to really have something that everybody could attend maybe that means I'm sleeping for an hour or so less um just this once maybe it means I'm going to save that for a day off maybe it means I'm going to take a day off again it depends on what it is you are planning or hosting and who you want to be able to come
3:38 - 4:08
communicate your availability if you're attending an event let your friends know when you can or cannot attend something they might not be able to accommodate it but they also might you never know until you try letting people know what your schedule is like gives more options for them to work around it especially if you specific ask them to hey that's really important that I attend this is there any way you could have it an hour or two later and you never know what they might say
4:08 - 4:55
and then prioritizing just like we discussed with boundaries it's important to prioritize what's most important to attend um so you might do that by identifying one to two things that are most important and seeing what can be shifted or what can become flexible so you can go um you're not going to be able to attend everything like anyone right nobody can probably attend every single event life happens we have busy schedules but if you can prioritize at least one or two things again if it's really important that I show up at my niece and nephew's birthday parties I'm going to make sure I can be there even if I have to compromise on a boundary a little bit if I have to take a day off half day something like that prioritizing what you want to be at so again it's up to you to make sure you can get there
4:55 - 5:36
Community involvement stay connected um so these are all kind of similar to how you're maintaining friendships but maybe in slightly different ways so when you're staying connected connected with Community involvement you might find other ways to support if you can't always be there um so I might follow my favorite small businesses on social media and interact that way I might make donations to my favorite Charities or places um I might spread awareness I might add Advocate right there are other ways you can stay connected without physically having to be somewhere all of the time
5:36 - 6:15
communication if you're organizing or you're on a committee for something you can again communicate your availability and if you're the planner you can plan around it again you might have to compromise or adjust some things from time to time but that's where the next step of prioritizing comes in prioritizing the organizations that are most important to you along with again one to two events that you might like to attend if this Gala is coming up at the end of the year and that's really what I want to be a part of make it so you can be there you might not be able to attend everything but that's where staying connected other ways and communication come into play
6:15 - 7:12
and lastly building support networks um we talked a little bit about this in one of the other parts but kind of looking for it again um friends and family identify what friends and family members are safe to talk to and to share feelings with who do you really trust to talk to about these kinds of things communicate hardships to them as well as share an appreciation if they're able to support you you know um I really appreciate you making time for me to talk about this even though it might be in the middle of your workday or you know just getting to acknowledge that you are grateful that they're there for you
7:12 - 7:49
co-workers and online communities making friends at work work sharing in the experience together right you both know what it is like to work the night shift and the impacts that might have you can seek support from online communities such as this one you can connect on other platforms like Tik Tok Reddit blog posts right the internet makes it really possible for us to connect with a lot of different people probably or maybe in similar situations
7:49 - 8:30
and then lastly therapy you can find a therapist using your insurance or Psychology today . you can get connected with group therapy maybe finding one where people are in similar positions or share similar feelings around work in community um all of these are options to you it's just a matter of what fits for you and what fits into your life and into your schedule right now
8:30 - 8:53
thanks for joining us for part four in the next part five we'll be talking about life management strategies see you
